the truth about writer's block

a visual representation of how writer’s block makes me feel.

writer’s block. god, just thinking about it makes my blood boil. it is one of the worst things i suffer from. i just wanna write—why are the ideas not flowing?! and before i know it, it’s been six months since i’ve written something and i’m sad because i feel most at peace and like myself when i write.

though recently for a class i gave a presentation on one of my favorite authors, someone i look up to so much: haruki murakami, who is a japanese author. he wrote one of my favorite books, sputnik sweetheart. he also wrote the wind up bird chronicle, norwegian wood, 1Q84, kafka on the shore, etc. (and, he owned a jazz club for seven years named after one of his pets—peter cat. incredible.) as i was researching him further, i found out that he has never had writer’s block. when i first discovered this i couldn’t help but laugh—how could someone never have writer’s block? but when i read his justification, it clicked. i wrote in my presentation that he claimed that he only writes when he has a story to tell. he says it feels like “snowmelt flowing into a dam” and like the overflowing water, he can’t resist writing it out. in those times of creative fluidity, he tends to go abroad to get away from distraction. he never struggles to write because he feels like the story is something that flows naturally, not something you struggle to create. because he doesn’t see writing as a job, there’s no due date or contract, so he doesn’t need to write when he doesn’t have anything to write. thus—no writer’s block.

i honestly truly admire this outlook. oftentimes, i find i am forcing myself to write something, especially in hopes of getting it published in a literary magazine of some sort(i have had previous publications which i will share soon!) because i feel that only then will my writing be valid—which is far from the truth. but this mindset sort of demotivates me from writing. i am editing way too much while i’m still just trying to get the story out(which i really don’t advise—more on this another time), and i am worrying that what i am writing isn’t “good enough” or “unique enough” and before i know it, another project has been abandoned and i’m crushed. but i just can’t get anything onto the pages that i’m happy with. i can’t think of anything.

but murakami has a point—really, why write when you have nothing to write? a story, an idea will come to you, and to me. and when it does, it will be beautiful, it’ll practically write itself and flow so effortlessly. people will happily wait as long as you need so long as you’ve put all of your heart and effort into it rather than rush it just to please people—in reality, that doesn’t please people. besides, you should be writing for yourself more than anyone or anything. then you’ll see the change—how you’ll forget what writer’s block even was. write to please yourself. as long as you’re happy with your writing, that’s what matters most. that’s why i’ve been actively writing again. that’s why i started this page.

though, feel free to take some inspiration for your travels! and leave what you don’t want for someone else.

words:

transient, transparent, translucent, ghost/ghostly, tainted, part, incentive, stars, glow, gleam, sway, away, frolic, frost, yearn, epitome, record, petrichor, beyond, glass, see, intimate, perceive, infinite, everlasting, demure, bungalow, enchant, dalliance, imbue, effervescent, epiphany, opulent, talisman, wherewithal, orphic, residency, eminent, should’ve, fool, waltz, yonder, sorrow, end, silhouette, idle, dew, regret, epiphany(one of my favorite words), enchant, labyrinth, waiting, destroy, linger, serenade, gallery, sweet nothings, reason, swing

names:

ivy, wren, adrienne, silas, milo, magnolia, elise, flora, lee, lorelai, céline, hazel, sebastian, pierre, clarice, yvonne, willow, harvey, lola, jane, lawrence, florence, maeve, sawyer, cassandra, iris, felix, roland, dylan, jasper, ezra, daisy, fiona, finch, august